


until she falls in love with me

by CheshireMadd



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Also rated for the occasional sex joke, Aromantic Alix Kubdel, Class Shenanigans, F/M, Hot Mess Adrien Agreste, Hot Mess Marinette Dupain-Cheng, Non-Binary Alix Kubdel, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Rated for the Possibility of Swearing, tiktok au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-08
Updated: 2020-06-23
Packaged: 2020-07-28 04:33:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 6,177
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20058079
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CheshireMadd/pseuds/CheshireMadd
Summary: Adrien Agreste documents his attempts to woo the girl he’s madly in love with.With a meme. Because how else?





	1. Day 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He finally escapes the waters of Denial  
\- Alya ;-P

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all! [mars_235](https://www.tumblr.com/dashboard/blog/perfectgalaxybouquetuniverse/186641879179) came up with this wonderful idea AND was awesome enough to let me try writing it! Here's to hoping I do it justice.
> 
> [ugli.gang.boy](https://www.tiktok.com/@ugli.gang.boy) and [Logan Collins](https://www.tiktok.com/@logan_collins9) are the two that I believe can best be credited with starting the trend?

Adrien Agreste’s face fills the screen. His mouth is slack, eyes are wide and full of tears. A female voice is heard offscreen.

“Sunshine, are you _crying_?”

He sniffles, and wipes his cheeks. The camera zooms out with some shaking. He’s sitting on a park bench. The dark skinned teenager next to him tentatively rubs his back.

_“How could I not realize that I’m in love with her?”_

Adrien draws a deep breath. He gets up and starts pacing. The video follows him, steady. The camerawoman lets out a chuckle.

“You can be pretty oblivious at times.”

“Alya, there’s oblivious and then there’s _blind_. And I am _definitely_ blind.”

He groans. “She’s way out of my league. She’s so cool! On a first name basis with Jagged Stone! And all of his rocker buddies. Clara Nightingale!”

“You’re absolutely right, nerd; she _is_ out of your league. So…. what are you going to do about it?”

“Can I do anything? There’s no way she’d be interested in me.”

The teenager still on the bench levels an exasperated look at the camera, or perhaps the person behind it, then pulls his hat over his eyes and tilts his head back and stays silent.

“How about you let her decide that for herself, hm?”

* * *

**Jordan Mullins**  
Is that the Ladyblogger holding the camera? He’s friends with her, right?

**Lucien Deschamps**  
who knew Adrien Agreste was an ugly crier? look how red his face is lol

**attawapiskat**  
um just ask her out? Only ones that would turn you down aren’t attracted to dudes.

**Adri<3**  
ill date u Adrien!!!


	2. Day 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adrien Agreste: A Brief Introduction

“I see you've stolen my phone again.” Alya is sitting next to Adrien, squished together selfie-style. She grins, unrepentant.

“How would you, Adrien Agreste, describe yourself?” She shoots him a look when he starts to open his mouth. “And don’t give me no bullshit interview answer, either."

He pauses. "Like you're introducing yourself to a new friend." Considers.

Finally grabs the phone, keeping the phone at the same angle she did.

"Hey, I'm Adrien. I’d say I’m pretty nerdy. I like anime and I calculate superhero physics for fun." He smiles easily as he talks.

"And yes, my mother had a fondness for alliteration."

Alya cackles. "You _do_ get that an awful lot."

"I'm considering putting it on my business cards."

"Real talk, though, this guy one of two behind every science and statistics post on the Ladyblog."

"Speaking of: this is my go--" Adrien's voice cuts off, strangled. Alya looks at him with concern until: "I've called her that _so_ many times!"

His face is scrunched as if the thought is physically painful. Alya takes one good look at him and laughs, louder than ever.

The video cuts.

* * *

Adrien's face is the color of mortification. Alya is similarly red, breathless and wiping tears from her face.

"_Anyway_, this cruel and relentless person is Alya Cesaire, Ladyblogger Extraordinaire." He's clearly proud of his wordplay and Alya rolls her eyes, but then the camera (and Adrien) is whirling around to settle on two approaching teens. The angle is awkward, still being in selfie mode, and his face is taking up at least half the screen.

Adrien indicates the darker of the two, who is the last from the previous video, and adopts an announcer’s voice. "Next up on People You Should Know. My best friend! This guy’s routinely kicked out of farmer’s markets! The one! The only! DJ Nino Lahiffe! He regularly drops his _beets_ onto SoundCloud and Youtube, under the username DJ Nino.” Finger guns at the camera.

“Seriously, dude.” Nino sighs, then looks offended when the asian next to him laughs. She covers her face with one hand and looks away from him, as if trying to hide it, but it does nothing to muffle the laughter or disguise the smile. Adrien’s own smile is much more broad than he’s done in any photoshoot.

“Well, that was your one good pun for the day. You might as well stop now.” There’s a teasing light in her eyes. Now it’s Adrien who looks offended, and Nino that’s laughing.

The video cuts.

* * *

**Tricotee**  
WAS THAT A PUN

**Louna Désirée Blaise Pape**  
Agreste, we’ve got to know….WHO ARE YOU IN LOVE WITH?????

**Angel_**  
is this how he acts around his friends? I like it, give us more!  
\--**Dirftway16**  
\--ikr? so much better than that ‘Golden Boy’ image

**Cockamamie**  
I bet he’s not allowed in a fish market, either ;)  
\--**Tricotee**  
\--WAS THAT A PUN  
\--  
\--  
\--(also is your icon a rooster??)


	3. Day 2.5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry guys! Other video got too long, so here's the rest of it... - Adrien

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From now on, the Day number will not match the Chapter number, and that's going to bother me more than a little bit. Not enough to call this Day 3, though.

The scene is the same as the previous video. In fact, it looks like it picks up immediately where the other left off.

Adrien’s face is a caricature of put-on hurt. He’s slowly walking backwards to the girl and Nino. “I don’t know if I should introduce you now, Marinette. That was painful. I’m in pain.”

Her face looks drier than an overbaked croissant. The screen settles, mostly hers and his faces and part of Nino’s.

He mimes stabbing his chest. “Like a knife. To my _ heart. _ Don’t you care about my heart, Marinette?”

She sighs, and mouth twitches. “You are the second most dramatic person I have ever met.”

Her eyes crinkle. She’s clearly not as annoyed as she pretends. Adrien rests his arm on top of her head. He’s not quite tall enough to make it look natural.

“Only the second most? Well, that’s disappointing.”

He lays his head on the arm that’s on her head. Her cheeks turn pink. She appears to be struggling.

“Anyway, you..uh...you introduced Nino wrong!” Her words come out almost too quickly to be understood.

Nino’s eyes widen. “Nette! Don’t you-!”

Hands and arms bloom around Marinette’s neck, circling and resting on opposite shoulders, and a new face pushes Marinette’s, which pushes Adrien’s, which pushes Nino’s out of frame. It’s the mayor’s daughter, Chloé Bourgeois.

Marinette startles, upsetting Adrien from his perch, pulling away until she sees Chloé. She relaxes, staring deadpan into the camera, while Adrien settles into much the same position as before. “What a spaz! I guess I should be thankful you didn’t drop us. What’s the video for, Adrikins?”

“Oh hey, Chloé! Everyone, this is my oldest friend and fellow tall person.” She sent him a grin.

“Find me a sword, and I’ll fix that defect for you.” Marinette mutters darkly as she ducks out of their arms and darts away. “And I am not your support pillar!”

The video jolts as, presumably, Adrien catches himself. It steadies and a pink head whirls between them. Too fast to be walking, but too smooth to be running. “Oh God, it’s spreading. Shoulda known it’d be the model next.”

“Alix has no respect for posterity. Maybe if they did, they wouldn’t lose track of the Score so much,” Alya retorts to the camera.

“Oy! I know exactly what the Score is. Kim’s the one that can’t-”

“Dupain-Cheng, wipe that _ disgusting _ look off your face.”

All eyes (and the video) turn to her. Alya winks and elbows her. “Actually, yeah, what’s got you looking so soft?”

Her eyes dart around, cheeks pinking. “I..uh..was thinking about how Adrien didn’t have any friends..uh, three years ago--well except for one horrible one--and now he’s got so many that we hardly have enough time to introduce them all, and that’s really rice--ah! _ really nice _.”

Chloé looks _ revolted _. Alix is miming throwing up in the background. Alya’s got tears in her eyes, squealing and squeezing Marinette so hard that a worried Nino is now trying to gently separate the two.

Adrien just looks at her with a small, soft smile and a fondness in his eyes that’s unmistakeable.

* * *

**Louna Désirée Blaise Pape**  
Is that her?! I bet that’s her!!

**gubbins**  
Off with their heads! lol

**Georgia**  
U GUYS R CUTE AF IM CRYING


	4. Day 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Marinette Dupain-Cheng gets her own into video.  
I used bits of the song [Umbrella by Train](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yVcoIlbTC3A) for this, so full credits to them! - Adrien

Day 3 starts with a closed classroom door and a drum solo. A girl with black hair and blue eyes, the revoked introduction, bursts in after a few seconds. Marinette is red-faced and panting; she looks like she just ran a kilometer. Guitar and piano join the drums as her eyes catch on what is likely the person holding the camera. She gives a bright smile and a small wave.

The music continues as the scene changes. Marinette and Alya sitting at their shared desk. Marinette’s head is thrown back, eyes almost shut. The laughter on her face is almost as contagious through the screen as it seems to be in real life.

Then Marinette is sitting under a tree in a park. The sky is blue and sunlight plays through the leaves.

* * *

Marinette and Adrien are sitting comfortably, each with an arm across the other’s shoulders, all laugh lines and sparkling eyes and belting out English lyrics.

_“Because!_  
When the sun shines, we’ll shine together  
Told you I’ll be here forever  
Said I’ll always be your friend  
Took an oath I’ma stick it out til the end  
Now that it’s raining more than ever  
Know that we’ll still have each other  
You can stand under my umbrella,  
You can stand under my umbrella.” 

Marinette stops here, but Adrien keeps going with _“Ella ella..”_ and peters out while she giggles. He soon joins her.

“Okay, Marinette Dupain-Cheng.”

“Okay, Adrien Agreste.”

“Tell the lovely people why this is our song.”

Her cheeks pink a bit, but she has no problem replying with a smile. “Because we became friends under an umbrella.”

His lopsided grin grows as he nods. “That we did.”

He pauses a moment. “I don’t have a good segway into this next bit.”

“I’ve got an easy fix for that. What’s the next bit?”

“The bit where I tell everyone how awesome you are!” Her eyes grow wide at that, her face darkens, and he quickly goes on before she can refute it. “Don’t try denying it! You’ve already got your own design business and we’re not even out of lycée yet. Your commissions aren’t even all fashion, but artwork and album covers and logos.”

“Well..yeah..but...a- a lot of that was really just luck! And Uncle Jagged giving my website a shout-out.” Her eyes dart around like she’s looking for something and doesn’t know what.

“Oh! And Jagged Stone considers you his honorary niece! He makes a point to have dinner with your family when he’s in town!”

“He just wants Papa’s desserts.” Slight eye roll there. “And! T- that’s hardly a reason to say I’m-.”

“You’re a Class A baker. Tom says that you’re only not as good as he is because it’s not your passion, but I’ve honestly never been able to tell the difference.”

“You don’t grow up in a bakery without picking up a few things. Prime example, you can offer me design advice. There’s hardly a creative bone in your body.”

“Me-ouch! Am I your scratching post now? Ooh, look, you can’t argue, there’s not enough-”

* * *

**LuminousCornelius**  
the most adorable

**King Zira**  
is she the one!!!!!!!!!!

**Spangles823**  
I’VE HEARD OF MARINETTE DUPAIN-CHENG!! She did some of Clara Nightingale’s stage clothes!

**Justine Droit**  
This one is two seconds under the time limit...why do I feel like Agreste cut it there just to be extra.


	5. Day 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I hope this answers some concerns! I’ve made sure to get everyone’s okay before posting videos :-) - Adrien

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one went a few places I wasn't expecting it to go...

Adrien and Marinette are sitting up against a brick wall. She’s looking amused while he’s reaching towards the camera. The frame is gradually getting wider as, presumably, the phone moves back.

“You bought a tripod for your phone? Are you going to be doing these videos a lot, then?” she asks.

“Yeah, look at this! It bends,” the frame shakes, “so it’ll hold on to stuff and I can mount it places, if I want. Alya suggested it; it’s really cool!” He sits back after the camera settles. “Uh..I know I already asked, but I want to ask again, are you okay with recording this? I think I know what you were leading in to, and it’s something I wanted to address.”

“Of course! I don’t mind..um.” Marinette gives him a nervous smile. She glances at the camera, and then back to him. Her fingers are tangled together. “I...wanted to talk to you um-about consent. There was a video posted that seemed...sensitive...And I want to trust Alya, I _do_ trust Alya, but she has posted some things in the past that crossed a line,” something like guilt splashes across Adrien’s face before it’s smoothed away, “and with her comment on that video...I just wanted...

“I just wanted to make sure that you knew about it.”

He looks sheepish, rubbing the back of his head. “You mean the one where I...um was crying.” His face is steadily growing redder. “Yeah, I posted it. Alya didn’t realize that I was…” his hand moves through the air “when she started recording, and then she thought it was kinda funny, and kinda cute, and I can see how it would be from her perspective and she didn’t dream that I’d actually post it...”

Marinette waits, lets him gather his thoughts.

“I’ve been pleased with the reaction that it’s gotten. Most of my fans have me on this perfect pedestal. And- well, you’re a designer, you know about the standards models are held to. Having people see that I’m not perfect has been..nice.”

“I think you’re perfect.” Both of them freeze and both faces turn tomato red. Marinette’s eyes are wide, mouth dropped open, surprised at herself.

Adrien recovers first. He smiles and shoulder-bumps her, which shocks her out of it. “You’re different. You’re my best friend. I know that you don’t have this flawless image of me.

“I think you’re perfect, too.”

Again, both of them seem frozen. And again, Adrien recovers first. “Alya _has_ gotten better about that.”

“Oh! Of course! Ever since she took those university journalism classes last summer. I’m not sure what that professor said, but by the end of it she changed her practices. Really cleaned up the Ladyblog, too.”

He nods. “What did you mean by ‘Alya’s comment’?”

Marinette digs out her phone and taps away, then holds it up for Adrien to see. He bites his lip, corners turning up. A giggle escapes. He tries to cover it with his free hand. More giggles escape. Marinette huffs and rolls her eyes.

“I’m leaving that. I’m _so_ leaving that.” A disgusted noise leaves Marinette. “What? It’s a pun!”

“It’s.. low-hanging fruit!”

“But it’s a _pun_.”

“Yeah, a bad one.”

Adrien looks Very Offended. “You take that back!”

She levels a look at him. “It’s awful. Puns should be used sparingly and for impact. Quality. Not...willy-nilly, reaching for anything you can grab.”

He gapes at her. “You’re a _pun snob_. The great Marinette Dupain-Cheng. _Pun snob_.”

“I am not a pun snob! I just think too many makes them lose their value. It’s like...like..if you flirt too much or..or you drink too much caffeine.”

Adrien clutches his shirt, over his heart. His eyes and nose scrunched up, teeth gritted. He wobbles, throws out an arm to catch himself. “Now you attack my flirting, and my caffeine. I don’t- I can’t- I’m not gonna make it! Tell Nino I love him.” His voice is getting progressively weaker. “He can have my games. And Alya! I’ll leave her my computer.” Adrien’s sinking down, barely holding himself up. “Chloe can take whatever’s left. And you. Even though you’ve killed me! You can have my entire wardrobe and..” he pauses, looks at his hand, “my ring.”

He falls to the ground. Dead.

Marinette stares at him. Then stares at the camera. Utterly expressionless. She reaches over to turn the camera off.

* * *

**Flavie Françoise-Marie Gagne**  
That first one was a little sus, glad to hear it wasn’t

**Kévin Josée Thomas**  
she looks so done with his bullshit 😂


	6. Day 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Learn from my mistakes, use Kitten Eyes wisely and responsibly. - Adrien

Adrien is reclining at a school desk. Nino’s head is bobbing, presumably to the music coming out of the headset around his neck, to the right. Marinette is sketching and Alya tapping on her phone at the desk behind them.

“So, Marinette.” Adrien’s facing the camera while addressing her. She continues her work. “Mariii.” Still nothing. Nino glances at them, then turns his head back to make another notation in his notebook. Adrien turns to face her, his chin on her desk and fingers tapping it. “Maaari-caaakes…”

Her eyes snap to his and her cheeks start to pink. Her mouth opens, but no sound comes out. Alya’s abandoned her phone and is watching the two with interest. Adrien plows on. “I was watching the Day 2 footage, which is entirely too long and I’m going to have to cut in half, which sucks, but, you said that I introduced Nino wrong?”

This immediately grabs Nino’s attention. His notebook is abandoned. “No! Nope. Nuh-uh. Don’t do this.”

Alya tries to stifle her giggles behind her hands. Marinette looks from Adrien to Nino and back. Repeats the cycle a few times. She looks ready to break.

“Nette!”

“But Nino! He’s giving me baby-doll eyes!”

“Kitten eyes!”

“Nino, he’s giving me kitten eyes!”

Nino pulls his hat over his eyes and waves his hand.

“Nino isn’t his name!” Marinette says almost too fast. “It’s a nickname. His legal name is Antonino! But he _hates_ it.”

Adrien seems like he’s in shock when he looks at Nino, who peeks out from under his hat. “Nino’s not even your real name,” he repeats. “I feel lied to. Who even are you?”

“Old news, Adrihoney. Everyone’s known that for ages.” Chloé sits down, forcibly moving Marinette to the middle of the bench. She glances down at Marinette’s sketchbook, then goes back for a second look. “I’ll take that blouse.” She taps it with the tip of her fingernail. Her lips purse, thinking. “Sabrina will have the skirt.”

She sighs. “It’s not finished yet, Chloé.”

“When it _is_ finished, Dupain-Cheng.” Like the answer is the most obvious in the history of ever. She rolls her eyes. “Tell me when it’s time for fabric, and I’ll get you Daddy’s card. And don’t tell Sabrina!”

The designer smiles and goes back to sketching while the heiress studies her nails.

“I didn’t know,” Adrien grumbles.

“Sorry, bro.” Nino shrugs and returns to his music. “Not even my moms use it.”

* * *

**Miriam Thibault**  
“Maricakes”? Thats her right? Thats got to be her.  
\--**LaurineSBM03**  
\--are we just going to ignore how pretty she is

**Antonino Planque**  
I think Antonino is a great name?


	7. Day 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Okay, in our defense, Marinette’s parents own a bakery - Adrien

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wasn't intending for both of them to have Kim scenes, but both of these popped in my head and were too good not to put in.
> 
> Many thanks to [miraculous-mess](https://miraculous-mess.tumblr.com) for helping with this one!

There’s a black bar across the top of the video with the text, “In editing these videos, I’ve come to realize exactly how many nicknames we throw around. Here are just some of mine:” Several clips play, one right after the other. Chloé, Nino, Chloé, Alya, Nino, Chloé, Marinette.

“Adrikins.”

“-dude”

“Adrichou~”

“Sunshine-”

“Bro.”

“-Adrihoney.”

“Total. Dork.”

-

“Hey, Model Behavior.”

Adrien stares at the tall asian. “Sorry, bro, I’m going to have to divorce you for Kim.”

“I’m heartbroken, bro, but I understand.” Nino makes a show of sniffing and wiping his eyes.

-

Marinette, glaring. “Adrien Croissant Agreste!”

Alya, “Hey, there, cinnamon bun..”

Alya, again, “White bread, I will end you.”

* * *

The text changes to read, “Marinette’s got plenty, too.” It starts off with Adrien, Alya, Nino, Nino, Alya, and Chloé.

“Mari.”

“Mari.”

“Mari.”

“Yo, Nette!”

“-starshine.” Marinette’s face goes pink when Alya says it.

“Dupain-Cheng!”

-

“Mare-Bear-”

“What do you want, Kimbo?”

“Hey now-- why-- I wouldn’t--” She silences him with a look. Kim, defeated, pulls a pair of pants from behind his back with a pleading look. Marinette sighs and takes them.

-

And it ends with a collection entirely of Alya.

“..cupcake”

“Mari-cakes”

“Macaron!”

“lovely little cinnamon roll”

“Sweets”

“-Muffin.”

“Crumbs Sugar Cookie.”

* * *

Marinette’s hands are fisted and meet under her chin in a busy school hallway. She has a dazed smile and a far-off look in her eyes. “Radiant.”

Her hands move to cover her cheeks. She’s trying and mostly failing not to smile bigger. “Carefree!”

The back of one hand meets her forehead as she closes her eyes. “Dreamy...”

She completes the set with a breathless, “Adrien~”. Drops her arms and falls backwards where Alya catches her easily.

Adrien’s laughter drowns out theirs as he says, “You guys are the worst!”

* * *

**HolyHyacinthBatman**  
Good to see Agreste knows what a meme he is

**Mathieu Abel**  
whats her @

**Adrien Agreste Official Fan Page**  
I’m freaking die😻 it’s tooo cute😻🥰😭

**squooshy**  
so many food names..


	8. Interlude: The Ladyblog

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here it is, folks! Last month’s non-akuma video submissions: The Convention Compilation!  
You guys sent in **so much** footage; so I’ll be posting a second compilation later in the week. Thanks for your support! - Alya Cesaire, Ladyblogger Extraordinaire

A group of people are down the street from the camera. They are all wearing black and all have blonde hair. The view turns 180 degrees to show Chat Noir. A cheshire grin and a wink, and he turns it back to the group. The camera bobs as he walks towards them. As he gets closer, it becomes clear that every person in the group is in a Chat Noir costume. They range from I-found-this-in-my-closet to well tailored, used-every-reference-image-the-Ladyblog-had-to-offer imitation. One cosplayer turns his head and catches sight of Chat. He waves and calls out, “Hey man, looks like you're going to the con, too! Wanna join us?”

Everyone else turns and most wave or call out greetings. “Sure! Mind if I record?”

They all look at each other, shaking heads. The first one responds as he holds out a clawed hand. “I think we’re all okay with that. I’m Bertrand.”

“I’m Chat Noir!” The group laughs.

“Yeah, so are we!” One of the girls says, still laughing. She’s wearing a simple jeans and t-shirt, both black, and a cat ear headband in blond hair that looks more real than wig. “Woah, wicked costume! Are those the ears off Amazon? It’s great to know they actually work.”

The group starts walking again, and Chat follows with his camera. They chatter about which panels to see (_Marvel vs Miraculous: What Comics Can Tell Us About Real Life Superheroes_ and _Protagonist? Villain? Goofy Side-Kick? How to Recognize Your Role in Life and What You Can Do About It_ seem to be two favorites), make bets on what cosplays they’ll see the most of (“I’m telling ya, Bertie, there’s gonna be more Ladybugs!” “Chat’s costume is easier!”), and eventually moves to celebrity sightings.

“_Guys_, did you see?! Adrien Agreste is coming! He confirmed on Twitter this morning. Says he’s got his costume ready to go and everything!” He hops up and down in his excitement. “Do you think he’ll dress up as Chat Noir? I _loved_ his work on the Ladybug and Chat Noir movie. His portrayal of Chat Noir was spot on! Do you think he’ll take a picture with me?”

“Don’t you mean ‘his portrayal was purrfect’?” Chat interrupted.

The teen smacks his palm to his forehead. “I can’t believe I didn’t think of that!”

Amid giggles, Black Jeans and a T-shirt speaks up again. “Okay, but is he a guest? Or a pleb like us? I’m sure that he isn’t going so he can be mobbed by fans, Matthieu.”

“It’s general knowledge that if you go to a convention in costume, people will want to take pictures.”

“It’s general courtesy to _ask_ before you take pictures, and back off if he says ‘no’.”

“Of course!” Matthieu raises his hands in defense. “Of course I’d back off.”

A curious sound, almost like a heavy-duty fishing reel being released and drawn back in, comes over the video. Chat’s slightly awed muttering can barely be heard, “This is one of the best parts of my day..”, and then Ladybug is dropping gracefully on the other side of the multiple Chat Noirs.

“Hi everyone.” She gives a brief warm smile and then turns her attention to the person behind the camera. Her blue eyes are vivid and piercing. “Are you coming or what?” She waits for a moment, expecting an answer. The group trade confused looks. “Look, I know you hate overscheduled days, but I have a lot to do today, and if I don’t follow mine, I _will_ end up disappointing someone.”

The silence continues. Black Jeans and a T-Shirt shifts from foot to foot. Tuxedo Chat wipes her hands on her pants. Professional Cosplayer Chat looks like he’s about to melt from Ladybug’s mere presence. The camera shifts and picks up a muffled _snerk_ that the cosplayers don’t register.

“Uh, ma’am?” Bertrand starts, then cuts off as she looks at him. “...we’re, uh….None of us are actually Chat Noir.” He pauses a moment. “We’re.. cosplayers?”

She stares at him with an amused eyebrow and a barely-there smile. “I know my partner when I see him.” She glances back at Chat, and mischief dances in her eyes. “Alright, fine, but I’m enacting a penalty game.”

Ladybug shifts her weight into a more relaxed position. Brings her fingers to her chin as if stroking an invisible beard. “Hm...I’ll just have to find your Number 1 Fan and see if I can sway her my way.”

There’s a loud gasp. Chat and his camera begin moving to the front of the group.

“Nope! No! Not happening! Sorry, guys, it was fun, but there is NO WAY in HELL that I am letting _that_ happen.”

“I’m sure it’d be so easy, too. She’s a fashion designer, isn’t she? All I’d have to do is show her how _fantastic_ she’d look in red.”

Chat practically chokes. Ladybug looks smug.

“_Bug._ You have the Ladyblogger. You have Adrien Agreste, and Chloé Bourgeois. _Jagged Stone._ You can keep your 90% of Paris. But Marinette Dupain-Cheng is _mine. You may not have her._”

“Hey! Jagged loves us equally. And it’s probably more like…” She seesaws her hand in approximation. “..78% of Paris.”

“Um…” The camera turns back to the cosplayers, who are wearing a variety of facial expressions. Mouth-gapingly dumbfounded. Disbelief. Confusion. Stars in the eyes excitement.

The feed cuts as they all ask for autographs.

* * *

"Mommy, look! It's Chat Noir!"

A small girl runs up and hugs him. She has a navy dress, red hair bow, and an orange bag.

“Élodie! You need to ask before you touch.” Élodie’s mom sounds both like she’s said this a hundred times today and like she thinks the scene is adorable. She steps around part of the crowd and into the camera view. Élodie immediately lets go.

“Can..can I ha-have a hug?”

Chat Noir looks _delighted_. His eyes shine and his grin is threatening to overtake his face. He drops to his knees to better accommodate the four year old. “Absolutely!”

She’s squeezing him for all she’s worth, and he’s holding her as if she’s the most precious child in the world. Her mom quietly produces a phone and snaps a picture. She glances at the screen with a small smile. Chat only pulls back when Élodie does.

“You are the cutest Kiki!” Chat tilts his head. He’s still on his knees, at her eye level. “But where is your Jiji?”

Élodie lights up even more and paws for her bag. The black cat plush is proudly presented. Chat takes it, gingerly, and says, “Did you know that cats can talk to one another?”

The little girl nods enthusiastically, hanging on his every word. He lifts Jiji to his cat ears and closes his eyes. Tilts his head. ‘Listens’ for a moment. She squirms, doing a kind of butt wiggle like she can’t possibly contain her excitement.

Finally, Chat nods. “Mm-hm. I’ll be sure to pass the message on.”

She jumps once, twice, three times. Her little hands are clenched fists not quite hiding her mouth. “What’d he say? What’d he say?!”

“He says that he loves you. And also please stop hogging the blankets at night.” His smile turns teasing. “Are you a blanket hog?”

They talk for a few more minutes. She asks him every question under the sun (“Ca-can you really see when the sun goes down? Do you eat cookies? Could you tie up a dinosaur and a tiger?”). She touches his ears and tries to stop his tail from moving. Her last question has him tapping his chest and beckoning Ladybug closer with his other hand. Élodie looks to her mom, who nods and smiles, and lays her head where he indicated. Ladybug slips a hand into his hair and, with what is clearly practiced ease, begins scratching. His eyes droop and close. They stay paused for a moment, until Élodie shrieks with laughter, pulls away to tell her mom giddily, “He purrs, Mommy! Like Jiji!”, then goes back to hear again.

When the little girl and her mom finally go on their way, the cameraperson has scooted close enough to the heroes to catch one final exchange.

Ladybug, who hasn’t taken her eyes off her partner and his tiny fan the whole time, says “Chat, if you ever decide to have kids, you’re going to make the most _incredible_ father.”

* * *

The previous scene ended with a red faced Chat Noir. And this scene starts with one.

The view zooms out to bring a full view of the dark haired Chat. Her costume is perfect, down to the honeycomb pattern on the fabric. Hair unbound and rockstar teased, blue cat eye contacts, clawed hands nervously twirling her belt-tail. She’s in a convention hall, surrounded by crowds of people. Some are in costumes like her, some in regular clothes.

“Are you livestreaming this?” Marinette says.

“Nope! But you can bet I’m putting it in this month’s submission compilation post. Your work deserves to be shown off!”

“Alyaaa, you’re making me blush!”

Alya laughs, then gasps as a giant space marine moves and reveals the real Chat Noir. “Chat! Chat Noir! Care to share a few words with the Ladyblog?"

He waves and works his way to them. He’s smiling brightly until Marinette turns to greet him, and he stops dead. His eyes widen and his mouth drops open. His face is now very, very red. He waves his hands like he’s trying to get something out and is having trouble, but then reigns them in, covering his mouth with one and putting the other to the opposite elbow.

“That’s, um,” His voice comes out high and squeaky. He clears his throat and tries again. “Wow. That’s wow. How, uh, how did you get the fabric to do that?”

She seems too stunned to answer for a moment. “L-lots of experiments. And practice. I had to do so much research on how fabrics are made.”

“Wow,” Chat says again. His eyes are roaming all over her form, taking in every detail.

“Hey, M, turn around. I want to get a good shot of you two!” The two jump a bit, but do as she asks and line up facing the camera. Standing next to him only exemplifies how exact her creation is.

Alya leads her impromptu interview with: “How long did it take you to make your outfit?”

“Mmm...six months or so, about when the presale tickets went live.”

“So long?” the superhero asks. He’s mystified.

Marinette just shrugs. “I knew that I’d have to work around school and commissions and other stuff, and I wanted to give the project the consideration it deserved.”

“What was the hardest part to recreate?” Alya asks.

Marinette laughs. “Definitely the fabric! I went through so many different types, trying to figure out the best way to get the pattern on right, because it’s just not something you’ll find in a store. I ended up contacting someone that I’d met at a design competition, and they were able to point me in the direction of a company that will print your pattern for you.”

Chat’s eyes widen once more and he pulls out his baton and starts tapping on it. Nino walks up, in a store-bought Chat Noir costume, also holding his phone out.

“Babe! No Adrien?”

Nino glances at Alya, then back down. “He says he’s here, but there’s so many people, it’s impossible to find anybody. Oh, hey, you found Nettie and Chat Noir. HOLY SHIT MARINETTE. That costume is _wicked!_”

He circles her, putting his phone up, then holds his fist out. She bumps it with a grin.

Chat harumphs and replaces his weapon. “Looks like LB’s already detransformed. I wanted to show off Marinette’s amazing skills!”

Alya laughs. “Ladybug’s right, though. M _does_ look fantastic in red.”

Chat stares at her, decidedly grumpy. The girl in question snorts out surprised laughter. A tall Mad Hatter in the background notices the camera and sticks up crooked bunny ears over Chat’s head. Alya cackles in delight.

“As I told my lady,” he wraps a possessive arm around Marinette’s shoulder, “_my_ Number 1 Fan. Not hers.”

He looks directly at the camera. “Oh, and to anyone still arguing over the position: Look at this” he gestures to her costume “and don’t even bother trying to convince me otherwise.”

* * *

**Dorothée Beranger**  
Yeah, that’s fair... She wore that costume to school the next day and it’s *chef’s kiss*. Also she’s, like, Chat Noir’s biggest defender. Word of advice: do not insinuate that he’s a sidekick anywhere this girl might hear.

**Antonin Lamarre**  
I've seen her Chat rants on the Ladyblog! She really knows her stuff!

**LuminousPollywog**  
Seeing Chat with that little girl cleared my face, watered my crops, and gave my grades the boost they needed.

**miraculousluckycharm13**  
THAT SOFT LOOK! #LADYNOIR IS REAL  
\--**Paradiddle**  
\--are we just going to ignore the marichat? chatinette? in the room?


	9. Day 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In his defense...he’s not a doctor. - Adrien ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Norakwami](https://norakwami.tumblr.com) gave the idea for this chapter <3
> 
> Also, in this magical world, Miracle Queen didn’t happen. Mostly because I started this fic before that episode was released, but also because it doesn't match with what I've already done with Chloé and I don't want to deal with fixing that.
> 
> CN: Yeah, there’s actually a frog dissection in this chapter. If you don't want to read that bit, just skip to the first page break. It's basically Marinette dissecting a frog (in class) with Kim doing a sportscast-ish-style commentary, ending in her telling him "She's dead, Kim".

Unlike the other videos, this one starts off with a message. White text on a black background, proclaiming “CONTENT WARNING: GRAPHIC DEPICTION OF FROG DISSECTION AHEAD”. It fades to a frog pinned to a tray, and steady hands making an incision up the center of its body. The scalpel lifts and forceps adjust. A whispering announcer makes his presence known. 

“There goes the first cut! Great use of forceps pulling that skin up! Now, the goal here is to cut through the skin and muscle _without_ cutting up all of the organs.”

Two more incisions are made, both perpendicular to the first. The camera pans up and shows Marinette focused on her task.

“Mare-Bear getting in more solid cuts. There’s the pins, and...perfect work!”

The camera zooms out a little, to fit all of Marinette and the frog in frame. She’s now cutting through muscle.

“This is delicate, folks! But my girl here is the one for the job. Steadiest hands in all of the 21st arrondissement.”

The view gets bigger. Kim, now shown to be Marinette’s announcer, continues his narration. She sets the scalpel down and reaches for scissors. The cuts she makes are quick and practiced; it’s easy to see that she’s more comfortable with the scissors. She pins the muscles back, to Kim’s encouragement.

“Perfect. Absolutely perfect. I’ve never seen more stunning work. This poor frog would agree that he’s been graced by an angel.”

“She.”

Kim blinks at her. “What?”

“See the eggs?” Marinette lifts her scalpel, holding it so the blade is flat. It balances a tiny and clear egg. “She’s female.”

“She’s gonna be a mom? Have babies? Raise up tiny tadpoles and teach them to stay safe from snakes and scientists?” Kim’s eyes widen with each word, steadily getting more excited.

“Nope.” Marinette sets the eggs aside and goes back to her careful operation. Kim’s face crumples at her denial of the happy life he’s imagined for the frog mom.

“But why not?”

“She’s dead, Kim.”

* * *

Kim, about to sit down, startles and makes a _frankly impressive_ leap backwards. Max, who is no longer standing next to him, looks completely baffled. Kim points in the direction of his chair with a shaky hand. “Sp-spider!”

Max adjusts his glasses as he peers down. “It’s dead, Kim.”

* * *

The camera follows Kim and Alix down the walkway. Both are wearing roller blades and protective gear. Alix has a clear lead, but Kim is gaining on them.

Alix has an easy time weaving between people walking. But Kim, twice their size, cuts straight across Chloé and Sabrina, and Chloé’s drink covers them both. A hush falls in the courtyard, and even the two racers are frozen and wide-eyed.

“YOU’RE DEAD, KIM!!” Chloé shrieks.

She drops her now sopping books, shoves her purse at Sabrina, and tears off after Kim. His horror turns to terror. He starts to take off, but Alix very deliberately stands in his way. He tries to go around. Alix moves with him. He tries a third time, but by then Chloé is grabbing his arm and flipping him to the ground.

He grabs at his chest and wheezes. “Since when can you do that?!”

_“Since I’m Queen Fucking Bee,”_ she spits out. Suddenly his wallet is in her hand and she’s pulling a card out of it. “Sorry, Max,” Chloé calls out, though she doesn’t sound very sorry, “Kim won’t be paying for the next date.”

She blows a kiss to Alix and storms back to Sabrina.

* * *

**Wigglytart1**  
Chloé Bourgeois, LesBEEan Hero.  
\--**FynHuz**  
\--Is it actually confirmed that she’s a lesbian?  
\----**Wigglytart1**  
\----I have no source, but I’m currently not taking constructive criticism on this.

**Shiu27**  
This guy’s a Grade A Himbo


End file.
